a promise to be broken
by angela
the west wing
september 2004
Sam will never forget the time he saw Josh cry.
The hotel room was cold and dim. A half-packed suitcase sat on the bed beside his friend, and it was only when Sam turned on the light did he realize that Josh was crying. It had surprised him at first, seeing tears on his best friend's face. This was Josh, the man who laughed at everything. He'd laughed after Mandy—and Sam knew he'd loved her.
Sam had stood motionless in the doorway, unsure of what to do. My father died, Josh said. There was no pain in his eyes, no loss, just an blank nothingness. Sam saw all this and more, and slowly realized that Josh would never be the same again.
He held Josh as he cried, and felt words rise up inside him, and they were just as unfamiliar as the love in his voice as he whispered them: I promise, Josh—I promise I will never hurt you like this.
Now Sam reaches across the hospital chair and holds Donna's hand, and wishes he'd never said those words.
I promised I wouldn't die before you. But you can't leave me now. Not like this.